Post by Remmy on Sept 9, 2011 0:19:52 GMT -5
"Come! Come! Gather 'round, folks. Gather 'round."
...called out that nyukka known as Remmy, waving his arms to the people walking in the hot Las Vegas sun to come to him him. He stood beside a cardboard sign that was propped up against the Lucky Starz Casino building with "The Amazing Remmy" crudely written in black permanent marker. He was dressed in a black tuxedo and sporting a red and black cape hanging from his neck. It probably wasn't the best choice of clothing to be wearing in this blistering sun. He was sweating his buttocks off out here. It trickled down his face like dew on grass in the morning. Why was Remmy out here in this getup? For the people, of course. He was making an unscheduled/unannounced/bored out of his mind appearance in Sin City. And he was going to give the people what they wanted. They wanted entertainment. Who was he to deny them what they craved? Remmy was going to provide said entertainment, even if they didn't know he was going to. He continued to wave his arms for people to come to him, while shouting...
"Come and be amazed by The Amazing Remmy! I will razzle you! I will dazzle you! You won't believe it until you see it with your own eyes!"
Some people started to walk his way, with confused looks on their faces. Remmy was all smiles though. He pointed to a guy in the group and said...
"You! Would you like to see something that'll completely blow your mind, nyukka?"
Random Bystander: "Uh... Sure...?"
"Alrighty then! Tell me, sir. You wouldn't happen to have a twenty dollar bill on you, would you?"
Random Bystander: "Yeah. I do. Why?"
"Give it to me."
Random Bystander: "I don't kn--"
"Trust me. I know what I'm doing. You'll get it back."
...Rather reluctantly and cautiously, the man reached into his pocket and produced a twenty dollar bill before Remmy. Remmy gleefully took the bill from the man's hand and held it in both hands, stretching it out and showing everyone who was starting to surround him...
"Alright! You see in my hand, a regular twenty dollar bill. I don't know this man. He doesn't know me. He didn't know I was going to ask him for this. This is a real twenty dollar bill. It is not a counterfeit, correct?"
Random Bystander: "To the best of my knowledge, it's legit."
"Perfect! Now watch and prepare to be amazed!"
...And Remmy proceeded to start tearing a corner of the twenty dollar bill, much to the horror of the man who had given it to him. Remmy simply nodded his head to the man and said...
"Trust me. I know what I'm doing. Now, take this piece here. And return it to the bank. Tell them what happened and I'm sure they'll replace it."
Random Bystander: "What?"
...Remmy handed the guy the corner of the dollar bill he had torn off. Then he continued to rip the bill again and again. Counting the number of pieces that he was making with each tear...
"Two... Three... Four... Five... Six... Hey, look. I showed you something amazing. We've learned how to count. Aren't you glad to live in a country that teaches you such wonder tools for life?"
Random Bystander: "What the Hell are you doing!? That's my money!"
"Hold on. Prepare for the razzle dazzle!"
...Remmy continued to rip the small pieces into even tinier pieces. Then he looked at the man and nodded his head. Remmy held the pieces firmly in his hand and then he threw the pieces high into the air above their heads. Screaming out...
"Alakazam! Twenty dollars worth of confetti! Hahahahaha!"
Random Bystander: "Motherfu--"
"Now, hold up. Wait a second. The tricks not over yet. You want to see me make these twenty dollar bits whole again? Alright. Don't blink or you might miss it..."
Remmy held out his palms to the people and then pulled his sleeves down to show them he had nothing underneath them. Then, he stood up straight and reached into his pants pocket. He reached far, deep down into the abyss that was this pants pocket and yanked his arm out quickly. Producing a whole twenty dollar bill in front of the man. It wasn't the same dollar bill that he was given, but it was a twenty dollar bill nonetheless.
"Tada! It's... magic!"
Random Bystander: "Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Gimme that twenty. Fuckin' jackass."
The man snatched the twenty dollar bill out of Remmy's hand and stormed off in a rage. Cursing under his breath about how his time was wasted and Remmy was full of shiz. However, it did not break Remmy's spirit. He simply placed his hands on his hips and let out a hearty laugh...
"Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! Are you not entertained!? That was a classic illusion!"
...Strangely enough, there were people still gathered around The Amazing Remmy. Among those people happened to be...
...called out that nyukka known as Remmy, waving his arms to the people walking in the hot Las Vegas sun to come to him him. He stood beside a cardboard sign that was propped up against the Lucky Starz Casino building with "The Amazing Remmy" crudely written in black permanent marker. He was dressed in a black tuxedo and sporting a red and black cape hanging from his neck. It probably wasn't the best choice of clothing to be wearing in this blistering sun. He was sweating his buttocks off out here. It trickled down his face like dew on grass in the morning. Why was Remmy out here in this getup? For the people, of course. He was making an unscheduled/unannounced/bored out of his mind appearance in Sin City. And he was going to give the people what they wanted. They wanted entertainment. Who was he to deny them what they craved? Remmy was going to provide said entertainment, even if they didn't know he was going to. He continued to wave his arms for people to come to him, while shouting...
"Come and be amazed by The Amazing Remmy! I will razzle you! I will dazzle you! You won't believe it until you see it with your own eyes!"
Some people started to walk his way, with confused looks on their faces. Remmy was all smiles though. He pointed to a guy in the group and said...
"You! Would you like to see something that'll completely blow your mind, nyukka?"
Random Bystander: "Uh... Sure...?"
"Alrighty then! Tell me, sir. You wouldn't happen to have a twenty dollar bill on you, would you?"
Random Bystander: "Yeah. I do. Why?"
"Give it to me."
Random Bystander: "I don't kn--"
"Trust me. I know what I'm doing. You'll get it back."
...Rather reluctantly and cautiously, the man reached into his pocket and produced a twenty dollar bill before Remmy. Remmy gleefully took the bill from the man's hand and held it in both hands, stretching it out and showing everyone who was starting to surround him...
"Alright! You see in my hand, a regular twenty dollar bill. I don't know this man. He doesn't know me. He didn't know I was going to ask him for this. This is a real twenty dollar bill. It is not a counterfeit, correct?"
Random Bystander: "To the best of my knowledge, it's legit."
"Perfect! Now watch and prepare to be amazed!"
...And Remmy proceeded to start tearing a corner of the twenty dollar bill, much to the horror of the man who had given it to him. Remmy simply nodded his head to the man and said...
"Trust me. I know what I'm doing. Now, take this piece here. And return it to the bank. Tell them what happened and I'm sure they'll replace it."
Random Bystander: "What?"
...Remmy handed the guy the corner of the dollar bill he had torn off. Then he continued to rip the bill again and again. Counting the number of pieces that he was making with each tear...
"Two... Three... Four... Five... Six... Hey, look. I showed you something amazing. We've learned how to count. Aren't you glad to live in a country that teaches you such wonder tools for life?"
Random Bystander: "What the Hell are you doing!? That's my money!"
"Hold on. Prepare for the razzle dazzle!"
...Remmy continued to rip the small pieces into even tinier pieces. Then he looked at the man and nodded his head. Remmy held the pieces firmly in his hand and then he threw the pieces high into the air above their heads. Screaming out...
"Alakazam! Twenty dollars worth of confetti! Hahahahaha!"
Random Bystander: "Motherfu--"
"Now, hold up. Wait a second. The tricks not over yet. You want to see me make these twenty dollar bits whole again? Alright. Don't blink or you might miss it..."
Remmy held out his palms to the people and then pulled his sleeves down to show them he had nothing underneath them. Then, he stood up straight and reached into his pants pocket. He reached far, deep down into the abyss that was this pants pocket and yanked his arm out quickly. Producing a whole twenty dollar bill in front of the man. It wasn't the same dollar bill that he was given, but it was a twenty dollar bill nonetheless.
"Tada! It's... magic!"
Random Bystander: "Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Gimme that twenty. Fuckin' jackass."
The man snatched the twenty dollar bill out of Remmy's hand and stormed off in a rage. Cursing under his breath about how his time was wasted and Remmy was full of shiz. However, it did not break Remmy's spirit. He simply placed his hands on his hips and let out a hearty laugh...
"Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! Are you not entertained!? That was a classic illusion!"
...Strangely enough, there were people still gathered around The Amazing Remmy. Among those people happened to be...